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"Read on"

Review by: RBekk
Review Date: 04/04/2005
Rating: 1.83
Criteria 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
Appearance
Construction
Flavor
Value
Overall Experience

Review Notes: This cigar wins the award for most disturbing ring ever. The ring is overly large, and displays the figure of a balding man in the center of a blood red background who can only be described as looking like an elderly Adolf Hitler fondling a kukuri knife, with a blank stare, and wearing a bell boy cap slightly cocked to the side. If they were going for a memorable ring, they certainly succeeded. Every time I see the ring, I imagine this sicko is about to kidnap me, molest me, chop me up, and feed me to his pigs, and not necessarily in that order. Oh, I’m supposed to be reviewing the cigar? Ok... The cognac this stick was soaked in tasted like it had been filtered through someone’s kidneys first. I should have tossed it after opening the wax sealed glass tubo and got a whiff of the odor emanating from the cigar, but alas after paying $13 bucks for this stick, I couldn’t bring myself to dump it. At least now I know why they chose to hermetically seal it in glass. Though the cigar appeared well made, the ring, wrapper, and cap were stained with swirls of what I can only hope was the cognac. Lighting the thing was surprisingly difficult since it had apparently absorbed so much alcohol I half expected it to burst into flames, and set my face on fire. Once lit, I hoped the burning tobacco would temper the overpowering smell, but when I put it to my lips I nearly gagged on the sweetness of the cap. If anything, the burning amplified the aroma and added a sickly sweet charred sugar smell. If the smell, construction, and taste weren’t bad enough, this is the first cigar I’ve ever suffered a physical injury from smoking. The draw was so tight it seemed like I was sucking on a milkshake straw; eventually I overstrained a muscle in my neck, and had to put it down. By “put it down”, I don’t mean gently placing the cigar in an ash tray, I mean in the sense of what you’d do with a rabid dog. As Huey Louis said about his soul stew being the baddest in the land, one dollars worth was all that I could stand. He’s right…sometimes bad is bad. For the sake of the entire cigar smoking world, please do not purchase these, even for a gag gift. I don’t want anyone at Gurkha to have a reason to make more of them.

Does this reviewer know this cigar? Yes (7) No (4)


"Try a Makers Mark instead"

Review by: RBekk
Review Date: 03/28/2005
Rating: 2
Criteria 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
Appearance
Construction
Flavor
Value
Overall Experience

Review Notes: After trying the delicious Makers Mark™ seasoned cigar, I felt adventurous enough to buy a Gurka seasoned with cognac. I expected the same treatment to quality as the MM, but was sorely disappointed. While the MM is only seasoned, the Gurkha seemed to have been dipped, and drip dried in cheap cognac. The draw was tight, and the flavor of cognac was strong and overly sweet, overpowering the tobacco. I’m glad I only purchased one, otherwise I’d have wasted $13 per stick. If you’re looking for a seasoned cigar, I recommend the MM. The best place for the Gurkha is to remain safely sealed in it’s glass tubo, never to reach the taste buds of polite society.

Does this reviewer know this cigar? Yes (5) No (8)



   


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