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Written by Kevin Godbee
Monday, 01 June 2009 00:00

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Have you pissed off your local smoke Nazi today?

You know, I never liked Nazi’s much. They conjure up images of things that are unpleasant and most distasteful. And what were Nazi’s but arrogant, bullying, angry people with the belief that they were superior and knew what was best for everyone else.

 

Hence the Smoke Nazi.

The term really fits those zealots who are hell bent on ending the evils of smoking for the entire world. They are self righteous and have zero tolerance for other people’s views. Yes, they know what’s best for us. Yes they are here to save you and I from the perils of disease and other nasty things they think might happen if we continue on our path of annihilation.

But what if I don’t want to be saved?

Well, whether you like it or not, they are here to save us all from ourselves, because we are obviously all too damned stupid to make conscious and intelligent choices when regarding our own lives. Oh thank you Mr. Smoke Nazi – thank you so much for playing God. Oh, thank you for saving my fellow man from the perils of second hand smoke by outlawing smoking everywhere - just to save my sorry ass. Thank you especially for eliminating smoking in public parks and golf courses, where there are wide open spaces and gazillions of gallons of fresh air for everyone to breathe. Thank you for not letting me smoke in my car, that was awfully considerate.

Oh, now I can’t forget, thank you so incredibly much for not allowing bar and restaurant owners to not have smoking in the places that they own and pay for. It is so appreciated that you have trampled on their constitutional rights told them what they can and can’t do, and instructed them on how to conduct business. And again, you are doing the kind deed of saving us local citizens from ourselves because we are just too goddamned moronic and bonedheaded to make a clear choice of whether or not to walk into an establishment that allows smoking.

Gosh, you people are just what the doctor ordered… Not!


 


 

 

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