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Written by Zack

Sunday, 08 February 2009

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So I decided to try the "Angry Whopper" from Burger King.  After watching the commercials I was thoroughly convinced that this was a burger on par with Hardee's jalapeno burger.  well after plunking down my cash for an angry whopper I ate it...

 You know what was angry about it?  Me.

There was no anger, no retribution for the abused onion, although I think they should sell the onion petals the adorn his burger with separately.  The burger was average and almost bland.  I wasn't happy and would never recommend this burger for anyone.  The advertising got me to buy one burger, but thats about it.

What does this have to do with cigars?  Keeps your pants on I'm getting to it.

I have seen many ads over the years about cigars being strong, being the strongest, being the cats ass (meaning best).  They haven't been strong, they weren't the strongest.  In fact, some of them even tasted like ass (I've never tasted cat ass, but I'm sure some even tasted like feline ass)

My advice and the point?

DONT BELIVE WHAT THE MANUFACTURERS TRY TO FUNNEL INTO YOUR GULLET!

Find out what you would like my talking to smokers you trust, don't trust the idiot kid behind the counter who would rather unwrap a fine cigar to use the wrapper to smoke oregano and catnip that his dumbass stoner  friend gave him as primo humboldt county weed.  If you cant find someone you trust, take up your own torch and lead into the darkness searching for knowledge of the taste you like.  Don't believe some dipshit manufacturer that doesn't even taste his own cigars, just smoked a sample and said thats good while the factory swaps out the good tobacco and gives him shit that he couldnt pawn off on some other sucker.

And because the owner of the cigar brand tells us its the best shit in the world doesnt mean it is, it just makes us like the dumb clerk who bought fake weed to pretend to get stoned.




Comments 

 
0 # Frank Flores 2009-02-09 04:50
You need a new handle Zack. How about The Angry Kilt?

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