Interesting evening.

[PerpetualNoob]

I absolutely loathe going downtown. It just sucks. Everything about it sucks. The traffic. The crappy parking. 98% of the businesses. The people. Anyway, one of our few local B&M's, Pete's Tobacco, is right in the middle of the whole disgusting mess. I haven't been there in at least ten years, possibly 15, I hate downtown so much. I did manage to force myself to go there a couple of weeks ago, only to discover they close at 6PM, which also happens to be when I get off work. Since I have neither a time machine, nor a matter transporter, I decided I would have to try again on a Saturday, when they are also open until 6PM. As it happens, last night was my company's annual "Holiday Party", which was also downtown, so I decided to leave early enough to stop by Pete's by 5PM, only to discover they closed at 3PM. I had even gone to the trouble of writing down their posted hours the first time I went there, to no avail.

Now, as anyone who has seen my investments or bank statements could tell you, I'm obviously not any kind of economist or financial genius, but you would think that, in our troubled economy, any business specializing in something so utterly non-essential would be scrabbling hard for every dollar they could get their hands on. Apparently, you would be wrong, since they are also closing at 3PM next Saturday, as well. Maybe business has been so dismal they figured the profits during those two hours wouldn't cover the cost of keeping the lights on and a cashier on duty? I'm starting to wonder if they're even worth all the trouble, but I have vowed to give them one more chance, next Saturday, now that I know the score.

Later, at the party, the topic of cigars came up, and not by me, amazingly. To my extreme surprise, I discovered that my boss, his boss, one of my cow-orkers, and one of our VP's are all 'occasional' cigar smokers! "Occasional", as in, 2-3 a year, or while fishing or golfing. I had no idea, except for one of them. I think there might even be a couple others who could be persuaded, too. We all work for a rabid anti-tobacco CEO, so there is this little underground cigar thing going on that only took me 13 years to find out about!

So, I've decided. On the 31st I'm going to pack up the travel case with an assortment of mild to medium cigars from my cooler and play Tardy Claus around the building, see who wants one. Then, once the weather warms up in the late Spring, I'm going to try to get everyone together for a Work-a-Herf, or three, all under the strictest security, of course. Take the grill down to the park, have some burgers and brews, or something. Make an afternoon of it.

As you can tell, I'm pretty psyched about it all. I was really feeling a serious Lone Ranger thing going on. All but one of them are married with children, and don't seem serious enough about it to be potential fellow Slope victims, but at least there is some hope for a little comraderie that I previously never dreamed of, with people I actually kinda like.

[orca99usa]

I hope you have better luck than I did. I organized a cigar herf for my alumni club and I was the only one who showed up. Given that this is Las Vegas, weather wasn't an excuse.

Regarding your local B&M - I don't know them so I can only make an educated guess, but maybe they once were open later but didn't do enough business after 6 PM to make it worth their while. It seems to me that any B&M ought to be open until at least 7:00 (some here are open until 9 or 10 PM). That would at least give the people who get off work late afternoon/early evening time to get there before closing. Some of our B&Ms have been known to stay open for two hours or more past closing if there are people in the store.

[andrewsutherland2002]

Originally Posted by PerpetualNoob

All but one of them are married with children, and don't seem serious enough about it to be potential fellow Slope victims.

I'm married with children, what does that have anything to do w/ being a slope victim?

[PerpetualNoob]

Originally Posted by orca99usa

I hope you have better luck than I did. I organized a cigar herf for my alumni club and I was the only one who showed up. Given that this is Las Vegas, weather wasn't an excuse.

I really don't know, but I'll float the idea out a couple of times and see what happens. They're all fairly sociable guys, so who knows?

Originally Posted by orca99usa

Regarding your local B&M - I don't know them so I can only make an educated guess, but maybe they once were open later but didn't do enough business after 6 PM to make it worth their while. It seems to me that any B&M ought to be open until at least 7:00 (some here are open until 9 or 10 PM). That would at least give the people who get off work late afternoon/early evening time to get there before closing. Some of our B&Ms have been known to stay open for two hours or more past closing if there are people in the store.

The signs on the door were computer printed with the times written in marker, and they specifically mentioned the two Saturdays, so I think it's probably a temporary thing. The permanent signs still showed Mon-Fri 10-6. Since I haven't been there in so long, I have no idea what kind of business they typically get on a Saturday afternoon. It's probably pretty slow, especially with it not only being The Holidays, but also in the distinctly non-tourist season, as well. Their TV ad says they have 'cigars', which could mean just about anything, pipes and tobaccos, and "men's accessories", like straight razors, shaving mugs, and the like. There's one brief picture of a pile of lighters, cutters, ashtrays, and that sort of stuff. I don't know what else they have.

Back in the day, they seemed to be charging boutique prices for the same stuff that everyone else in town had for less, one of the main reasons I only went there a few times. During the season, they have a captive audience amongst the tourist foot traffic. They're in walking distance from most of the big hotels, and they're the only ones who are.

Oh, they also have one of the ugliest buildings in a town that has elevated ugly buildings into a martial art form. "You think that's ugly? Ha Ha, you wuss! I can design an uglier building in my sleep!" The place I work for actually built one that was so hideous that it won an architecture award from the City. I made the mistake of asking if they were ever going to finish it, and didn't get a raise for the next two years. Don't do that.

[totallytentative]

Originally Posted by PerpetualNoob

As you can tell, I'm pretty psyched about it all. I was really feeling a serious Lone Ranger thing going on.

Thanks for the laughs (I also just noticed your sig: "micro-herfing". LOL) and good luck. I wish I knew anyone who was into cigars, at work or at home.

[PerpetualNoob]

Originally Posted by totallytentative

Thanks for the laughs (I also just noticed your sig: "micro-herfing". LOL) and good luck. I wish I knew anyone who was into cigars, at work or at home.

I've come up with my own private terminology:

Herf = three or more smokers
Mini-Herf = two smokers
Micro-Herf = One Smoker
Nano-Herf = No one's smoking, including yourself.

[thebiglebowski]

so, why were you trying to go to this B&M after so many years away?

[PerpetualNoob]

Originally Posted by thebiglebowski

so, why were you trying to go to this B&M after so many years away?

Mostly to see if they're worth adding to my rotation. We have 'tobacco shops' all over town, but I only know of two others that have an actual humidor. I just want to see what they have, for my own curiosity.

[totallytentative]

Originally Posted by PerpetualNoob

I've come up with my own private terminology:

Herf = three or more smokers
Mini-Herf = two smokers
Micro-Herf = One Smoker
Nano-Herf = No one's smoking, including yourself.

I actually came up with the same thing for beer a while back:

Brewery: The big factory that looks like an oil refinery
Micro-brewery: The "little guy" breweries
Nano-brewery: Brewing beer in one bottle or mini-keg
Pico-brewery: Using pipettes and putting the requisite ingredients in a tiny glass vial with one lonely yeast cell in it.

[JCK]

I hope the company mini-herfs work out for you! Could be to your advantage sharing smokes with the right people. :]

[PerpetualNoob]

Originally Posted by khubli

I hope the company mini-herfs work out for you! Could be to your advantage sharing smokes with the right people. :]

It's sort of an unwritten rule of living here in the Big Cold Dark, whenever the weather is decent, you almost feel obligated to go out and do something in it. Consequently, people's schedules are pretty crazy during the warm months, so getting all of them in one place at the same time may not be possible. Hopefully I can at least get most of them together a couple of times, though.

[orca99usa]

Mostly to see if they're worth adding to my rotation. We have 'tobacco shops' all over town, but I only know of two others that have an actual humidor. I just want to see what they have, for my own curiosity.

I went into a B&M here who hype themselves in numerous radio ads as the best tobacco shop in town. They recently opened a branch near me, so I went inside for a look-see. They had a small walk-in humidor, but most of the stuff in it was things like Backwoods, Phillies and so forth (you don't see too many places store cigars like that in walk-ins). There were a few Don Nobody-type sticks and the few premium brands I recognized were overpriced. I won't be going back.