The official Make Fun of Thompson's Cigars thread

[txmatt]

Many of us have dealt with Thompson's and felt stupid afterwards. Who else calls customers for bait and switch games or hires spamming companies to mail out the deals?

For the longest time, when I would get a Thompson's catalog it would go straight into the trash. Don't know why but last week I flipped through one that had missed the trash. I was amused by the terrible errors throughout the catalog; particularly the product inaccuracies.

Whether you are brimming with cigar cigar knowledge and spot the errors right away, or a cigar neophyte wanting to expand your knowledge; post in this thread when something Thompson's says about a cigar is wrong..
(yes I am bored and avoiding work today)

-Matt-

[txmatt]

May 2006 catalog, page 63.

When describing the Genuine by Puros Indios cigars, Thompson's copy states, "From a strain of tobacco grown on his own Honduran Farms, he has patiently developed fillers and wrappers every bit as good - even better - than those of his homeland."

When intervied by the cigar press, Reyes is frequently asked why he uses NO HONDURAN TOBACCO in his cigars. Reyes replies that he doesn't like Honduran tobacco, and the Honduran government allows him to operate his factory in the country even though he doesn't use Honduran tobacco. The wrapper on Genuine cigars is from Ecuador, and the fillers are from Nicaragua.

Way to go Thompson's. Spend some of your advertising budget on accurate copy.

-Matt-

[carbonbased_al]

EVERYTHING IS A PUROS! No, no it's not.

Et ce n'est pas en français !

[Da Klugs]

Selling Iguanas. Aren't they endangered?

[Corona Gigante]

Originally Posted by Da Klugs

Selling Iguanas. Aren't they endangered?

Weren't they Don Juan's favorite smoke?

He used to catch a couple, knock 'em on the head, roll 'em up in banana leaves, and herf it up with young Carlos Castenada.

Wouldn't that make some great Thompson's copy?

[mike32312]

I use the Thompson's catalog to line my bird cage. Pages fit perfectly. Their also good for picking up dog poop.

[PaulMac]

My favorite has gotta be the ad copy for the CAO Italia...especially when you read it in the breathless awe voice the writer surely had when he wrote it lol

"One of the cigar worlds highest ranked and most difficult to find cigars, CAO Italia (when it can be found at all) is always limited to the purchase of one or two sticks at a time. Only because we have been begging for them, buying all we could, hoarding the miniscule number we were allotted for the past twelve months, we have a very modest amount for sale"

When it can be found at all? 1 or 2 at a time eh? I know at least 10 sources I could call up right now and order as many boxes as I want lol

[DriftyGypsy]

Wait a minute, you mean you want me to read that catalog... I guess I coud wait for the next one, since the last one went right from the mail box to the circular file.

[txmatt]

May 2006 Page 38, the new Bolivar.

varietal long filler tobaccos........, and Nicaraguan Oretepe..

Granting this is just a spelling error, but the island is actually spelled Ometepe.

Comon gang, isn't this fun?? Find the errors and exaggerations.

-Matt-

[carbonbased_al]

Originally Posted by PaulMac

My favorite has gotta be the ad copy for the CAO Italia...especially when you read it in the breathless awe voice the writer surely had when he wrote it lol

"One of the cigar worlds highest ranked and most difficult to find cigars, CAO Italia (when it can be found at all) is always limited to the purchase of one or two sticks at a time. Only because we have been begging for them, buying all we could, hoarding the miniscule number we were allotted for the past twelve months, we have a very modest amount for sale"

When it can be found at all? 1 or 2 at a time eh? I know at least 10 sources I could call up right now and order as many boxes as I want lol

After my experience with the Toscanis, I think I will be staying away from Italia's, no matter how uber rare they are

[Teninx]

And somewhere in an office in Tampa, after 100 years in business, a cigar executive laughs.

[RedBaron]

carbonbased_al loves him some Tuscanies.

[Poriggity]

I seriously can't stand Thompsons. I refuse to order from them.
I feel dumber every time I flip through thier stupid catalog.
All they seem to sell are thier house cigars, and they all taste like Crap.. Ive had my fair share back in my days before I knew better.
Scott

[aceswired]

I made the Thompson's mistake when I first started. Here's my Thompson's story.

I was smoking one of their house brands on the deck one night. Suddenly, I felt something burning my leg. A large, flat stone had fallen out of the cigar. It was about quarter sized, a tad fatter, and elongated (maybe a bit smalller than a quarter, but not by much.

No kidding - a whole ****ing stone wrapped up in the "handmade" cigar. I emailed customer service. I even included a picture of the stone.

Did they apologize? Nope. Did they offer me a little something for my trouble? Nope. They thanked me for my email, added an advertisement, and that was that.

I still have no idea how a stone got in a cigar. It was a robusto, so it had to be taking up almost the full width of the cigar.

[doctorcue]

WOW!

That cigar must have got you stoned!

I know I know...