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This is a discussion on Why the US is in trouble within the General Discussion forums, part of the Everything But Cigars category; A Washington, DC airport ticket agent offers some examples of why our country is in trouble! 1. I had a ...
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#1 |
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Puffer Fish with many spikes
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Why the US is in trouble
A Washington, DC airport ticket agent offers some examples of why our country is in trouble!
1. I had a New York Senator ask for an aisle seat so that her hair wouldn't get messed up by being near the window. 2. I got a call from a candidate's staffer, who wanted to go to Capetown. I started to explain the length of the flight and the passport information, then she interrupted me with, "I'm not trying to make you look stupid, but Capetown is in Massachusetts," Without trying to make her look stupid, I calmly explained, "Cape Cod is in Massachusetts, Capetown is in Africa," Her response - click. 3. A senior Vermont Congressman called, furious about a Florida package we did. I asked what was wrong with the vacation in Orlando. He said he was expecting an ocean-view room. I tried to explain that's not possible, since Orlando is in the middle of the state. He replied, "Don't lie to me, I looked on the map and Florida is a very thin state!" 4. I got a call from a lawmaker's wife who asked, "Is it possible to see England from Canada?" I said, "No." She said, "But they look so close on the map." 5. An aide for a cabinet member once called and asked if he could rent a car in Dallas. When I pulled up the reservation, I noticed he had only a 1-hour layover in Dallas. When I asked him why he wanted to rent a car, he said, "I heard Dallas was a big airport, and we will need a car to drive between gates to save time." 6. An Illinois Congresswoman called last week. She needed to know how it was possible that her flight from Detroit left at 8:30 am and got to Chicago at 8:33 am. I explained that Michigan was an hour ahead of Illinois, but she couldn't understand the concept of time zones. Finally, I told her the plane went fast, and she bought that. 7. A New York lawmaker called and asked, "Do airlines put your physical description on your bag so they know whose luggage belongs to whom?" I said, "No, why do you ask?" She replied, "Well, when I checked in with the airline, they put a tag on my luggage that said (FAT), and I'm overweight. I think that's very rude!" After putting her on hold, for a minute, while I looked into it (I was laughing) I came back, and explained the city code for Fresno, CA is (FAT), and the airline was just putting a destination tag on her luggage. 8. A Senator's aide called to inquire about a trip package to Hawaii. After going over all the cost info, she asked, "Would it be cheaper to fly to California, and then take the train to Hawaii?" 9. I just got off the phone with a freshman Congressman who asked, "How do I know which plane to get on?" I asked him what exactly he meant, to which he replied, "I was told my flight number is 823, but none of these planes have numbers on them." 10. A lady Senator called and said, "I need to fly to Pepsi-Cola, Florida. Do I have to get on one of those little computer planes?" I asked if she meant fly to Pensacola, Fl. on a commuter plane. She said, "Yeah, whatever, Smarty!" 11. A senior Senator from Mass called and had a question about the documents he needed in order to fly to China. After a lengthy discussion about passports, I reminded him that he needed a visa. "Oh, no I don't. I've been to China many times and never had to have one of those." I double checked and sure enough, his stay required a visa. When I told him this he said, "Look, I've been to China four times and every time they have accepted my American Express!" 12. A New Mexico Congresswoman called to make reservations, "I want to go from Chicago to Rhino, New York." I was at a loss for words. Finally, I said, "Are you sure that's the name of the town?" "Yes, what flights do you have?" replied the lady. After some searching, I came back with, "I'm sorry, ma'am, I've looked up every airport code in the country and can't find a Rhino anywhere." The lady retorted, "Oh, don't be silly! Everyone knows where it is. Check your map!" So I scoured a map of the state of New York and finally offered, "You don't mean Buffalo, do you?" The reply? "Whatever! I knew it was a big animal". Now you know why Government is in the shape that it's in! Sadder still is we keep voting for these bozo's and returning them to office!
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5thDan [SIZE=1]A well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear arms, shall not be infringed I love my Country but I fear my Government[/SIZE] |
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#2 |
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Howler Monkey
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Re: Why the US is in trouble
Ahahahahaaha these are funny - I love #2!
On second thought, they're sorta scary too. |
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#3 |
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The CS Little Spoon
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Re: Why the US is in trouble
LMFAO.. thanks for the early morning (noon) laugh!
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--The Oompa Stellis Aequus Durando |
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#4 |
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Puffer Fish with many spikes
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Re: Why the US is in trouble
Great post.
I especially love the one re: the Senior VT Congressman, (Vermont only has one). Thanks for the smile ![]()
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#5 | |
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Full grown Puffer Fish
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Re: Why the US is in trouble
Quote:
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--Chris |
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#6 |
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User Title Wanted
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Re: Why the US is in trouble
BRILLIANT!!!!!!!!!!!A friend of mine worked in a hotel and got a call from upstairs. A couple called claimed they couldn´t lock their safe. My friend went upstairs confused as the hotel only had one main vault. He knocked on the door and they gestured him in.. " the combination doesn´t work " they said while dumbfoundedly staring at a microwave... |
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#7 |
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Puffer Fish with many spikes
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Re: Why the US is in trouble
too funny. and these are people who we have chosen to run the most powerful nation in the world.
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__________________ This space for rent... |
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#8 |
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Puffer Fish with many spikes
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Re: Why the US is in trouble
I would like to hope that the future of my Country doesnt rely on these people. Lets hope my generation is able to produce better leaders...
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#9 |
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Pink is the new black
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Re: Why the US is in trouble
part of me really hopes alot of those are made up....but they are funny either way
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#10 |
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CS Cog
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Re: Why the US is in trouble
Wow. I suppose that since is not in the joke section they are all real. What a shame.
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#11 |
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Puffer Fish with many spikes
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Re: Why the US is in trouble
"The Government that governs least, governs best." Thomas Jefferson.
Nuff Said.
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"...when you have eliminated the impossible whatever remains however improbable must be the truth..."Sherlock Holmes "One morning I shot an elephant in my pyjamas..." Groucho Marx "Shorter of breathe and one day closer to death..." Pink Floyd |
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#12 |
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Leading Puffer Fish
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Re: Why the US is in trouble
Hey I don't suppose you work for a travel agency do you? These sound familiar, I run a travel agency.
Reminds me of the time our client wanted to be on the shady side of the ship on a cruise. She didn't want the sun coming in on her balcony and ruining her trip. After trying to explain the rotation of the earth and the fact that cruise ships are mobile, she looked at me and said "I'm not stupid". Uh, yeah, right.
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Tobacco is a dirty weed. I like it. It satisfies no normal need. I like it! It makes you thin, it makes you lean, It takes the hair right off your bean, It's the worst darn stuff I've ever seen. I like it! |
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