This thread is full of grea advice: comfort, preference, experience, Cal and penetration choices, practice..... all play a part.
For me carry is a springfield xd 9.
Home is a Mossberg 12 gauge pistol grip.
Practice is 80 percent those and a few others comprise the other 20 percent for fun.
I would add a key self defense thought is to avoid (if possible) ever using your firearm (call the cops, give the asshole your watch or car, etc and go home to your family). Remember that's IF possible.