Little Johnny Returns

[nhlfan]

So the teacher was going through the alphabet, asking kids to name an animal that started with each letter. She is hesitant to call on Little Johnny due to his recent outbursts of swearing and cursing.

"Can anyone name me an animal that starts with the letter "A"", she says. Little Johnny raises his hand.

"Pick my b#$#h, pick me, I know that s%&t!".

"No, Johnny. Until you can watch your language, I am not going to pick you. How about you Sally?"

"An alligator", she replies.

"Very good, how about one that starts with a "B"", she asks next. Again, Johnny's hand shoots up.

"You'd better pick my unless you want an a#$ whooping", he yells.

"I said no Johnny, you are not going to get called on misbehaving like that. How about you Tommy?", she says.

"Mmmm, how about a Baboon?", replies Tommy.

"That's right!", exclaims the teacher. They continue on this way, with Johnny yelling and cursing the whole time. Finally they get the the letter R.

"Can someone name an animal that starts with an "R"", she asks, holding her breath for the outburst from Johnny that is sure to follow. to her suprise, Johnny rasies his hand an sits nice an quietly, awaiting his turn. Since no one else raised their hand, she decideds to take a chance.

"OK Johnny, what animal starts with an "R"?

"A Rat." he says.

Amazed, the teacher says "VERY GOOD Johnny, an no yelling or swearing or....."

"Yeah, a big f#(king rat with a d&#k this big", he says, holding his hands wide apart.

[Cigary]

I love that kid,,makes me laugh everytime. I especially love when the teacher asked the class to use the word "definitely" in a sentence. She goes around the class asking other kids while Johnny is busy waving his hands,,,she skips over him at least 10 times until the teacher could no longer ignore little Johnny and his waving arms and hands. Ok Johnny, what is it? Teacher he says, does gas have lumps? No Johnny, gas does not have lumps. Well then Teacher, I 'definitely' $hit my pants.