Ole's accident

[fiddlegrin]

Ole, had a car accident.

In court, the trucking company's lawyer was
questioning Ole. "Didn't you say, sir, at the scene of the accident,
"I'm fine," asked the lawyer."

Ole responded, "Vell, I'll tell you vat happened. I had just loaded
my favorite mule, Bessie, into the..."

"I didn't ask for any details, the lawyer
interrupted. Just answer the question. Did you not say,
at the scene of the accident, "I'm fine!"?

Ole said, "Vell, I had just got Bessie into the
trailer and I was driving down the road..."

The lawyer interrupted again and said,
"Judge, I am trying to establish the fact that, at the scene of the
accident, this man told the Minnesota Highway Patrolman on the scene
that he was just fine. Now several weeks after the accident he is trying to
sue my client. I believe he is a fraud.
Please tell him to simply answer the question."

By this time, the Judge was fairly interested in Ole's
answer and said to the lawyer, "I'd like to hear what he has to say
about his favorite mule, Bessie."

Ole thanked the Judge and proceeded. "Vell as I vas
saying, I had just loaded Bessie, my favorite mule, into
da trailer and vas driving her down da highvay ven dis
huge semi-truck and trailer ran da stop sign and smacked my truck
right in da side. I vas trown into one ditch and Bessie vas trown into da
other. I vas hurting real bad and didn't vant to move.

However, I could hear Bessie moaning and groaning. I
knew she was in terrible shape just by her groans. Shortly after da
accident da Minnesota Highway Patrolman came to da scene. He could hear Bessie moaning and groaning so he vent over to her. After he looked at her,
and saw her fatal condition, he took out his gun and shot her right 'tween
da eyes.

Then the Patrolman came across da road, gun still in hand, looked at
me and said, "How are you feeling?''

"Now vat the hell vould YOU say?"

[CapnCrusty]

One afternoon, Ole calls up the funeral home and says "Lena, my vife of 45 years just up and passed way in her Barcalounger. I need you to come and get her so dat she can get ready for da funeral."
The funeral director says "I'm truly sorry to hear that Mr Swensen. Give me your address and we'll be there shortly."
Ole says "Ve liff down to da end of Eucalyptus street".
The funeral director asks "How do you spell Eucalyptus?"
There's a long silence and finally Ole says "How bout I drag her down to Oak Street and meet you dere?"

[karmaz00]

lol good one

[Legion]

Ok those are some of the funniest ones I have seen

[nativetexan_1]

There's a man looking ahead.