They walk among us-and they vote!!!!!!!!

[germantown rob]

Some guy bought a new fridge for his house. To get rid of his old fridge, he put it in his front yard and hung a sign on it saying: "Free to good home. You want it, you take it."

For three days the fridge sat there without even one person looking twice at it. He eventually decided that people were too un-trusting of this deal. It looked to good to be true, so he changed the sign to read: Fridge for sale $50." The next day someone stole it.

Caution... They Walk Among Us! (And They Vote!)


While looking at a house, my brother asked the real estate agent which direction was north because, he explained, he didn't want the sun waking him up every morning. She asked, "Does the sun rise in the
north?" My brother explained that the sun rises in the east, and has for sometime. She shook her head and said, "Oh, I don't keep up with that stuff."

They Walk Among Us! (And They Vote!)

I used to work in technical support for a 24/7 call center. One day I got a call from an individual who asked what hours the call center was open. I told him, "The number you dialed is open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week." He responded, "Is that Eastern or Pacific time?" Wanting to end the call quickly, I said, "Uh, Pacific".

They Walk Among Us! (And They Vote!)

My colleague and I were eating our lunch in our cafeteria, when we overheard one of the administrative assistants talking about the sunburn she got on her weekend drive to the shore. She drove down in a convertible, but "didn't think she'd get sunburned because the car was moving".

They Walk Among Us! (And They Vote!)

My brother has a lifesaving tool in his car; it's designed to cut through a seat belt if he gets trapped. He keeps it in the trunk.

They Walk Among Us! (And They Vote!)


My friends and I were on a beer run and noticed that the cases were discounted 10%. Since it was a big party, we bought 2 cases. The cashier multiplied 2 times 10% and gave us a 20% discount....

They Walk Among Us! (And They Vote!)

I was hanging out with a friend when we saw a woman with a nose ring attached to an earring by a chain. My friend wondered, "Wouldn't the chain rip out every time she turned her head?" I explained that a person's nose and ear remain the same distance
apart no matter which way the head is turned...

They Walk Among Us! (And They Vote!)

I couldn't find my luggage at the airport baggage area, so I went to the lost luggage office and told the woman there that my bags never showed up. She smiled and told me not to worry because she was a trained professional and I was in good hands. "Now," she asked me, "has your plane arrived yet?"...

They Walk Among Us! (And They Vote!)

While working at a pizza parlor I observed a man ordering a small pizza to go. He appeared to be alone and the cook asked him if he would like it cut into 4 pieces or 6. He thought about it for some time before responding. "Just cut it into 4 pieces; I don't think I'm hungry enough to eat 6 pieces."

Yep, They Walk Among Us! (And They Vote!)

[Ermo]

Originally Posted by germantown rob

My friends and I were on a beer run and noticed that the cases were discounted 10%. Since it was a big party, we bought 2 cases. The cashier multiplied 2 times 10% and gave us a 20% discount....

Should have bought 10 of em!!!

[MaverickAPhiT]

Those were funny. I got funny looks from my co-workers.

[Twill413]

Much like Bill Engvall's "Here's your sign" bit. Good stuff.

[Charles]

That was funny! Thanks - CS needed a laugh after this weeks drama.

[rumballs]

Originally Posted by germantown rob

My colleague and I were eating our lunch in our cafeteria, when we overheard one of the administrative assistants talking about the sunburn she got on her weekend drive to the shore. She drove down in a convertible, but "didn't think she'd get sunburned because the car was moving".

I got sunburned pretty badly on the way back from the shack, but it was because I thought the weather was going to be crappy again and I wouldn't make it all the way home with the top down


And related to this joke, here's a site I mentioned at the shack - some funny stuff here:
http://chroniclesofgeorge.nanc.com/

[WNCsmoker]

my friend lost his wallet once. i told him it would be in the last place that he would look. he responded, "how do you know"

[scrapiron]

Thanks, made me laugh!

[Lumpold]

I work in a bar, and have had several customers who don't understand that if Whisky is 40%abv per shot, a double isn't 80% abv....

Caution, they walk among us. And vote.

[Nerachnia]

These made me smile :-)

[LSU_Stogie]

that was pretty good german...

I had a friend on a very known cigar forum I frequent...get this, he's getting married!

They Walk Among Us (And They Vote)