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Just need some encouragement.

This is a discussion on Just need some encouragement. within the Thoughts and Prayers forums, part of the Everything But Cigars category; Well today I finally took control and asked my Chief if we could sit down and talk. I asked for ...

  1. #1

    Leading Puffer Fish V-ret's Avatar


    Just need some encouragement.

    Well today I finally took control and asked my Chief if we could sit down and talk. I asked for his help with getting me into some type of anger management/stress management class/counseling. I need something or I'm going to snap. I'm smoking 2 packs of cigarettes a day. Lately I haven't been able to get sleep (laid in bed thinking of work and my heart rate started climbing and I started shaking) I ended up sleeping on the couch, things I use to enjoy (shooting, bunny blasting, metal detecting) I don't want to do anymore.

    I snap over the smallest things and I've yelled and said some really messed up things to a guy I work with, I don't think I can take them back but he just kept pushing me and pushing me and I lost control. Its getting bad, I don't leave my house on weekends anymore and I sit here on Puff. If the wife wants to have a conversation I clam up because I don't want to snap on her, but this clamming up is hurting our marriage. I'm just scared that I'm going to start yelling and freak out so I don't say anything at all.

    I use Puff as an escape, I don't get mad here and I enjoy everyone's company. Its my stress relief after work. Even though this place is awesome for calming down I need to find a different way, I also need to figure out why I'm going crazy. Small things use to never bother me, now they are hitting every nerve. I don't know..

    I'm nervous but glad my Chief was able to help me make the call for the appointment and also allow me to take time off work to get the help I need.

    I consider everyone here to be really good friends so I'm just putting to words my feelings and asking for your encouragement. I told the wife about 30 minutes ago and she's glad I'm taking the first step.

  2. #2

    No longer a community member.


    Re: Just need some encouragement.

    Hope everything works out for ya man, sounds like your going in the right direction already.

  3. #3

    The Krazy Kanuck WyldKnyght's Avatar


    Re: Just need some encouragement.

    Jeremy, you've already taken the first step admitting you have a problem and need help. I have dealt with similar issues in my life as well, keep your chin up and work hard and you'll come through fine bro'
    The Krazy Kanuck

  4. #4

    Midlife crises Puffer mcgreggor57's Avatar


    Re: Just need some encouragement.

    I can't offer any advice but wish you the best in working through everything.
    Tobacco Cellar: http://www.tobaccocellar.com/mcgreggor57
    Never trust a woman's tears or a dog's limp.

  5. #5

    Leading Puffer Fish V-ret's Avatar


    Re: Just need some encouragement.

    Thanks guys. I'm not the type to talk about my feelings but writing them is easier for me. I was very scared to post this and had my pointer on the button for a while before I finally let go and submitted my post. I wasn't sure if I wanted to put this out or not, but I figured it could only help.

  6. #6

    No longer a community member.


    Re: Just need some encouragement.

    I can tell you a crazy messed up world might have something to do with your frustrations.. but that's for you to determine with professional help. But you're not alone Jeremy and there are healthy ways to take out aggression as well as practice acceptance. I'm sure you will sort it out - asking for help is the right answer. Keep coming around tho!

  7. #7

    Leading Puffer Fish protekk's Avatar


    Re: Just need some encouragement.

    Jeremy I really believe that you are being proactive by realizing that you need something or someone to help you work through some things. Strong men get the help they need to better their lives and the lives of their loved ones. Keep your head up buddy. I wish you the best of luck and hope you find the peace you are looking for.

  8. #8

    Dread Pirate Wombat Dark Rose's Avatar


    Re: Just need some encouragement.

    Been there, done that, got help, still getting help.

    You've made the first step in the right direction. Trust me, once you can find the proper and correct help (whatever it may be), things will get so much better all around.

    Good luck man!
    Shooter. Gamer. Hunter. Father. Geek. Atheist. NRA Life Member 2011

  9. #9

    Full grown Puffer Fish Marcm15's Avatar


    Re: Just need some encouragement.

    Jeremy - I was forced to retire from my 27 year Law Enforcement career after a line of duty accident made it impossible for me to continue. I went through the EXACT same emotions and feelings as you are. It took me two years and almost losing my wife and kids before I realized I needed help. It was the best move I ever made. Hang in there brother, better times are coming. PM me if you want to vent at anytime...
    ďA good cigar is like a beautiful chick with a great body who also knows the American League box scores". - Maxwell Q. Klinger - Mash 4077

  10. #10

    Elder Puffer Fish Leader


    Re: Just need some encouragement.

    First step is identifying the problem and second is trying to resolve. You are 2/3's there. You can do it.

  11. #11

    No longer a community member.


    Re: Just need some encouragement.

    Just curious what you do for a job when you say your Chief. Also want to wish you the best of luck and just know we are all here to help and listen when you need to vent brother!

  12. #12

    Leading Puffer Fish V-ret's Avatar


    Re: Just need some encouragement.

    I'm in the Navy, so he's my Leading Chief Petty Officer (LCPO). Sits behind me in our office and just makes sure things are getting done. He does a lot more work than what he should do, but that's just the type of guy he his. He's a good person and called me about an hour ago to make sure I was doing alright. My meeting is tomorrow at 1330 so I'll find what there is available for me then.

    I just want to find a way to calm myself down, hopefully this will begin tomorrow. Thanks again for all the support! It does make me feel better

  13. #13

    I'm watching you.


    Re: Just need some encouragement.

    I just got coined by a retired master chief who is also a Scoutmaster and he told me that he feels it's his job to treat his guys with the same respect he treats his scouts, and vice versa. Sounds like your chief is a great guy and will bend over backwards to help you. Good for you for having the courage to ask for help! I know it's not easy.

    Know you're in my prayers, and my ear is always available to bend. I promise not to destroy your mailbox in the immediate future, so don't stress about the impending doom that may or may not come your way later ;-)

    "Only fine cigars are worth smoking, and only men who smoke fine cigars are worth kissing." -Joan Collins

  14. #14

    Cigar Artist DarrelMorris's Avatar


    Re: Just need some encouragement.

    It takes courage to admit that you have a problem and seek help. You should be proud that you are man enough to do that. The Navy should be able to get you the help you need and it sounds like your Chief is there for you so you can get through this.

    You said that you have a hard time discussing your feelings verbally but you don't have a problem doing it in writing. Try keeping a journal where you can vent and get all of the poison out. I've also written long letters when I've been exceptionally angry with someone or just feeling fed up. Once I get it all out, I burn the letter. This has really helped me to clear my head in situations where I didn't want to blow up at someone.

  15. #15

    No longer a community member.


    Re: Just need some encouragement.

    If you ever need someone to talk to, or just someone to listen, I'm sure anyone here would be willing, and if not, I am.

    That being said, I'll pray for you, keep you in my continuous prayers daily, and support your actions as you've done them, dealing with anger, especially if you have a predisposition towards it, is very difficult, but few ever even try to seek help, so mad props to you for that.

    Be well, and treat yourself well, else you'll never manage to get over this.

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