Alright, you want to get deep.
Our past is part of what makes us who we are. We learn and grow and become better people, (hopefully), but our decisions and what we have gone through mold who we are. You can't reject the past as bad and only embrace the present. You have to embrace both as part of what makes you who you are. People want to separate the good in themselves and embrace that while rejecting and dismissing the bad. We are all both at the same time. That will never change. You have to embrace both the good and the bad as making up the whole of who you are. That doesn't mean you live in your faults or continue making the same mistakes or see your bad as good, but you can't live as half a person. You will always make mistakes and do things and make decisions that you will regret. Embrace it, learn from it and move on. See it as part of who you are and accept it. I see you as a good person and you obviously see yourself as a good person and you also obviously beat yourself up a little bit about your past. It forced you to make decisions and change your life for the better. That's a good thing. Without going through what you went through and being forced to make the decisions that you made, you wouldn't be who you are today. It gave you the opportunity to change. Don't try to cut yourself in half and reject things about your past or things that may be less than good about you now. Embrace yourself as a whole imperfect person. No one is all good, and the more you try to minimize things that you don't like about yourself or things that you don't like about your past, the more those things will haunt you. It's much easier to work on your weaknesses or feelings about your past if you acknowledge them and embrace them as part of you. The more you try to dismiss the things that you don't like. past or present, the more you will obsess about them.
Or just tell me I'm full of it.